The most important aspect of successful marriage is the love between the couple. Marriage, by definition, is a union of two different and opposite people. There is no such thing like complete perfection or 100% harmony between the couple in a marriage because the upbringing, background, educations of both couples are different.
The fact is that, no marriage can be happy 24 x 7 for 365 days. Difference of opinion is very much normal in a marriage. There are times when the couple do not feel comfortable to be in a marriage. However, it is the love between the partner, that holds them back in a marriage and because of that they make an extra effort to find their way for living a happy married life.
In the context of marriage, love is not just a feeling of attraction, but it is much more than that. Feelings are transient in nature. Feeling keeps on fluctuating. Sometimes the feeling of attraction can go up and other times it can go down. That is why, for a healthy and long lasting marriage, love has to be more than the mere feeling of attraction.
For long lasting marriage, love is a decision to develop a strong bond of attachment with spouse through understanding and caring them better with each passing day throughout the life. The growth of love with advancement of time is essential for a successful marriage. If love is not growing, it is certain that love will lose their charm.
To ensure the growth of love, you have to work at marriage every day. Although it is a responsibility of both partners to make the marriage work for better, but that should not deter you from taking an initiative to work at marriage. So make a conscious effort each day to grow to love in a marriage:
Healthy communication is the key to successful marriage. It is healthy communication that let the love really grow in a marriage. Even argument with partner is good for marriage instead of maintaining a silence to avoid it. By indulging in an argument you can communicate your point of view on certain issue freely to clear the differences and that in turn increases the trust. Holding grudges by avoiding argument is not a sign of happy marriage. To fight with respect without disrespect with partner make you feel relaxed, stronger, and increases your level of love and care about your partner. So get indulged in healthy communication to grow in love for enjoying a happy marriage.
In a marriage, expectations need to be manage on a priority basis otherwise it will create a problem. Marriage is not a guaranteed way for fulfillment of all expectations. Both men and women are by nature different and so is their expectations. It is not easy for one partner to sense the expectations of other one and put in effort to fulfill all one by one. So it is essential to let your partner be aware of your expectations but makes sure it is realistic. Do not have high expectations and invite frustration in your married life. Your spouse is not gifted with divine power to fulfill all of your demands.
As an individual, both partner in a marriage are unique in their own way. It is unfair to expect from your spouse to change themselves according to your terms and conditions. By wanting to change your partner, you convey a message that your partner is not good, perfect, or wise. The harmony in relationship is not maintained by finding fault in spouse but by practicing understanding, acceptance, love and respecting the uniqueness of your spouse. That is why, it is wise to give each other the personal space to grow so that both can bring more value in a marriage.
Finally, the demand of successful marriage is hard, but it is worth the effort. Both partner need to make some compromise for each other and their happy relationship. On the individual level, both partners are incomplete and because of that they meet together to complete each other and make the marriage a blissful experience of their lives. So to enjoy the bliss of happy married life, you should put in effort to grow to love in marriage.